I don't call an investigation a case. It isn't a case to me, because that would imply a necessity for conclusion. That's just not what I do; I'm not going in to solve anything. I'm not going in as a detective. There's nothing that I'm trying to figure out, and I don't believe I can offer anything considered proof of the paranormal in any substantial manner. It took me a while to realize what I really wanted out of the paranormal, and through the experiences and training that I've had, I realized I want to just investigate locations with the intention of possibly having an inexplicable occurrence. Or more than one, I'm not picky. What I want is to come away with enough to create something in order to present it on my own terms.
The location finding, the research, the planning, the filming, the (sometimes downright fucking ridiculous) equipment, the act of being in an investigation in a place that inspires feelings of anxiety and fear of the unknown, the reactions, the place, the footage, the analysis, the final video... the whole project is worth it.
And this stuff is freaky, it's scary and fucking terrifying to people… What's wrong with wanting that? Am I headed to places where known paranormal activity is said to occur? You bet your fucking ass I am. I'm headed to as many of those places that I can get to without the cost being ridiculous (but I'm all for supporting places that need conservation when possible) and without the travel arrangement being an impediment to one night of investigation.
Of course there's still something to be said about being the first to investigate a location. I remember clearly a time when that was my goal, and that was the goal of the team I was on, and that made perfect sense too. While I'm not asking for that possibility of primary evidence anymore, I'm also in no way asking for a guarantee of anything happening. No one can. What I am asking for, is a substantial experience in a place where others have been able to document experiences as well. While it doesn't mean shit for any definite paranormal activity, it offers a better probability that I can get something worth the final product for myself. I'll take those odds and may they ever be in my damn favor.
It's that simple. This is all it is for me. It is not for the paranormal community, it is not for science, it's not to better the world through some never-before-documented phenomena, it is not for fixing people's problems or alleged problems. It is for me.
Thanks for reading,
