Hi ghouls, goblins and, oh yeah - trolls. I know you're here even though you've never said a word on anything I've written. Welcome back, bitch. Take a seat.
The last two weeks of internet use have been telling in many ways. Let's start way back.
Full Dark operates on ethics that came from a rocky start in January 2017 that was born from cynicism and frustration in the paranormal. I was coming off of a year+ long break from it all after an absolutely GODAWFUL time on a paranormal team complete with sex scandals, lies entangling literally 10 people over 4 years including 2 pedos (yeah straight up, it's fucked up), and the most egregiously narcissistic and at the same time, completely worthless group of people I've ever encountered all at once. My favorite part about that team is that most of those people have turned into nothing. They aren't doing anything new or exciting in the paranormal and nearly all of them aren't even involved in the field anymore, and that's very telling. I know they check on me from time to time though. 😘
I was still likely healing from that when Full Dark started. After meeting Ryan in the beginning of 2018 and my investment in a "real" computer (MacBook Pro), we reassessed, I learned, I grew, and we dropped several teams and investigator "friends" from our circle and set out to be excited and curious and work on what we love above anything else with the right intentions in mind. We saw how before, we were drawing in hardcore/mean/PoS skeptics who just exist to be mad and cruel and often sexual predators toward women. Yeah I said it. After ghosting those types of assholes, we began finding people like ourselves, and the algorithms kept providing fantastic paranormal people to engage with. Many of them are women and for that I was fairly stunned.
We then joined the Traveling Museum of the Paranormal and the Occult at a top tier level (yeah let's lay all the transparency on the line - we SUPPORT Greg and Dana and BELIEVE IN THEM, BELIEVE THEM, LOOK UP TO THEM and TRUST THEM 💯), and we learned even more by listening to them and following their work and their journey. We saw a great example of what people can be in the paranormal and we took inspiration. Straight up. Those are the big things. We've spent the last 4+ out of 5 years learning, constantly. Questioning the dogma and ourselves. This changed us for the better, but damn do I not see a whole lot of that out in the paranormal at large. That's where my new frustration is focused.
When you find people who have similar ideals, goals, ethics, research, inclusion and community in the paranormal, you keep em close and you work to seek out the same type of folks. It's driven myself and Ryan forward in kindness and in building up others who are in the same pursuit of the Strange and Unusual. That is our basis. That level of support extends to those out there doing the same while being a public presence on social media, who've proven themselves authentic, kind, real. Up the fuck front. They show their endeavor in the paranormal before they show their teeth. Or hell, they don't show their teeth at all. Kindness and bullshit free is what we ground ourselves and our work in.
If you think that's weak, continue to underestimate us. Our entire body of work speaks for itself and we have been transparent the entire time. We make VIDEOS, ffs. You can SEE the entire journey of us.
You haven't seen me argue on the topic of the paranormal or even personal matters on social media in months on social apps. That is on purpose. I'm not engaging, and I'm not so petty as to land a statement on social media about HOW I'm not engaging because I'm somehow "better". Bitch I ain't better than you, do you hear me? We are COLLEAGUES, EQUALS. Yet the garbage I see on social media FROM women TO women makes me want to throw up right here on my laptop. When women are seen having fun and supporting each other, other women get mad. Internalized misogyny rears up.
The audacity. How are you determining you are in some way better or smarter or more than anyone else in this field? Have you found no solace in coming together with other women in the way we've been able to, especially in the last year? You competing not complimenting? Are you asking yourself why you're so uncomfortable with other women's successes? Look in a mirror. Scry it the fuck out.
There is so much competition and cruelty in online spaces where creators land their work. We're all existing within and utilizing systems literally built to enforce that negativity and to compel us to play along and compete against each other in a false reality we curate within our actual reality. I see so many women doing this, and I'm disappointed and sad and straight up scared of some of you, and yet I am STILL going to double tap your photos, share your work, and tell you when you're doing well. I am going to continue to boost your signal. That is metal as fuck and I will stand by that. And bitch, while I continue to support you, work on yourself. I am trying to build you up, not tear you down. We are not at war with each other for some numbers, clout or publicity-driven top spot. That is some high and mighty bullshit on your part and you need to turn the fuck inward and unpack that. Get your mind elsewhere, get it somewhere good.
GET BUILDING. GET CURIOUS. GET PROUD OF YOUR WORK, SEE YOUR GODAMN VALUE. GET KIND. GET SOME COMPLIMENTS YOU REALLY MEAN ON EACH OTHER'S ACCOUNTS. BOOST SIGNALS. BE INCLUSIVE.
FIGHT THE FUCKING GOOD FIGHT AND GET REAL.
No one gives a fuck about what you aesthetically tailor for the black mirror as much as who the fuck you really, REALLY are. Trust.
- Amy
